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I Change but Cannot Die Series - Remnants of Humanity -- by Ruby
Rating: NC-17
Description: Spike and Angel and Willow, and Spike and Willow, sequel to Sunnyhell Revisited.
Note: Dedication -- To everyone on the list as an apology for my huge screw-up when sending the last part. I'm such a dope.
Disclaimer: Joss owns everything. Period.
Willow watched, concealed by the shadows, as Buffy and Xander crossed the street to the Bronze. A leggy brunette stepped away from the small group that had gathered on the sidewalk. She took Xander's hand as he bent to kiss her. The trio exchanged words, and Buffy's laughter was carried along the night air and across the pavement.
"That must be the happy couple," Spike sneered from over Willow's shoulder.
She leaned back against him, and he wrapped his arms around her. Spike looked down at her in mild concern, "You okay, baby?"
"Yeah," she nodded. "It's just--harder than I thought it would be. They've gotten on with their lives. What else could they do?"
"Come on, pet. Let's grab something to eat," he pulled her gently away from the animated scene that had transfixed her.
"It all seems so long ago, like a different lifetime," she murmured as they walked, hand-in-hand, through the park.
"It was a different lifetime, luv," he told her.
"It's like trying to recall a dream," she looked around her at the benches and picnic tables. "We used to come here a lot, to make plans for the evening, plans for the future."
"You miss it," Spike said.
She stopped and turned to look at him, "No, not exactly. Those memories were tainted long before London. I guess I miss what might have been, if they hadn't turned against me, against us. Still, they were my friends. They meant a lot to me."
"I know," he whispered.
"Why do I feel this way?" she asked. "Why do I feel like I want to hold them and rip out their throats at the same time? Am I supposed to feel this way? I'm a demon now, after all."
"Better tell her," Angel spoke as he appeared from the leafy cover of a nearby tree. "She's going to figure it out sooner or later."
"Angel," Spike snarled.
"Tell me what?" Willow asked.
"What you are," Angel replied.
"I'm a vampire," she shrugged. "What's to tell?"
Angel looked over her at her sire. Spike's eyes flashed murderously back at him.
"Spike?" Willow's hand tightened in his. "What is it?"
Spike reached into his pocket and drew out a packet of cigarettes. He brought one to his mouth and lit it. He inhaled deeply and released a thin stream of smoke as his mind searched for a way around this, knowing there was none.
"You're a demon," he finally spoke. "You're my childe."
"But?" she prodded.
Spike cast a glance at Angel. He'd started this. Let him explain it to her.
"But there's a part of you, a small part, that's retained part of your goodness," Angel said. "Sometimes, when a human is turned, their innate nature is so deeply embedded, the demon can't completely eradicate it. I've heard of it happening, but I've never met one, until now."
"You're saying I have a soul, like you?" she asked.
"Not a soul," Spike answered. "Just a small part of the original human. When it happens, it's usually a tendency toward sadism or savagery."
"In your case, it's benevolence," Angel added. "That human part of yourself that could never hurt anyone."
"I'd hurt people, before," she said.
"Not intentionally, not without provocation," Angel replied. "There's a part of you that still feels empathy for the people you cared about before."
"But I want to hurt them. I really do!" Willow told them.
"That's the demon. It's stronger than the human remnant," Angel explained. "But that human element can be nurtured. It can grow and strengthen."
"The world doesn't need another compassionate vampire, soulboy," Spike growled.
"If it's what she wants," Angel argued. "Is it, Willow?"
"I want Spike," she answered. "Just Spike."
"You've got me, baby," he told her. "Find someone else's mind to play with, Angel. She belongs to me."
Angel backed off, unwilling to chance turning Willow against him. He knew he couldn't help her without her sire's consent, but he could gently persuade her, and she, in turn, could convince Spike. Their pull on one another was undeniably strong. She'd obviously been feeding from her sire's blood. But that pull could be used to her advantage. With guidance, she could bring Spike to accept the idea of cultivating the humanity that lived within the demon. It would take time and patience, but both of those were eternally abundant.
"Spike, take me home," Willow asked softly.
"Come on, pet," he nodded and turned a warning glare on Angel.
Willow spent a sleepless day in Spike's arms. He awoke to her cold body lying close to his, her arm absent-mindedly stoking his chest.
"It's okay, Willow," he told her.
"I don't want to be like him," she said. "I don't want to spend forever agonizing over a past that never ends."
He tilted her chin and looked into her eyes, "That won't happen, baby. You're my childe. I made you what you are. I made you strong, and I'll keep you that way."
"How?" she asked hopefully.
"You are what I am. A part of me resides inside of you, Willow. That can never be undone. Think about it. What do you really want from the slayer and the rest of them?"
Her answer was immediate, "Pain. I want them to feel pain."
Spike smiled, "Then you'll have it."
"But what about the other part, the human remnant? Isn't that what Angel called it? Where does that fit in?"
"Right here, baby. Between us, where it's always been. I can satisfy that part of you, the part that needs to hold and be held, the part that needs to be compassionate and soft. You give that part to me."
She lay very still against him, letting his words wash over her mind and calm her anxieties.
His hand cupped her breast, caressing her soft flesh, "The rest of the world can satisfy the demon."
She moved around and brought her body down on his, "You do a damn good job of satisfying that part, too."
He smiled and brought her mouth to his. She felt his hardness against her belly and moved her hips against his, impaling herself on his cock. Spike placed his hands on her breasts, and she grasped his arms. He had taught her well. She had become an accomplished lover. Her body demanded his release, and he threw his head back and thrust up into her. She lowered herself and bit into the flesh below his collarbone. Spike held her to him as she drank from his power, her body shuddering from the release of her orgasm.
She rested on top of him, the full weight of her body pressing down on him. He rubbed her back and licked at her earlobe. Willow trembled in pleasure and placed a kiss on his neck.
"Oh, Satan. Who needs humanity when you can have this?" she whispered.
He chuckled into her ear, "Home, sweet home hasn't been much fun for you, has it, baby?"
She raised her head to look at him, "I'm starting to like it better. The sun will be setting soon."
"So it will. What would you like to do tonight, little one?" he smiled.
"Let's go out and play," she suggested.
Spike looked into her dancing eyes and grinned, "Sunnyhell is your sandbox, my love."
The End
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