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Changing Hearts Series - Know This -- by Ruby
Rating: PG-13
Description: Willow confronts Oz, sequel to Past Wounds.
Note: Spoilers -- Wild at Heart, The Initiative.
Disclaimer: Joss owns all.
Oz had telephoned Willow early the following afternoon and asked to come over to her house to talk. She had stubbornly refused, insisting instead on meeting with him later at Giles' place. Although he hadn't liked the arrangement, he hadn't pressed the matter, satisfied that she had agreed to talk with him on any terms, especially if he had hurt her as badly as Buffy had said.
He took a deep breath and tried to steady his nerves as the door opened. Giles watched as the redhead entered and then quickly grabbed his tea cup and beat a hasty retreat to the relative safety of the kitchen as Spike stepped in behind her. Oz tensed as two more figures came through the doorway behind the unlikely couple.
"Looks more like a debate panel than a private conversation," he said as Buffy and Riley took chairs across from the sofa.
"I asked them to come," Willow told him.
"We need to talk alone," he replied.
"No," she shook her head. "That's what _you_ need. I need the support of the friends who wielded dust pans and helped me sweep my life back together after you tore it to pieces."
"I didn't come back here to hurt you," he argued.
"You didn't leave to hurt me, either. But it did hurt, and I really don't think you have any idea of just how much."
"It wasn't exactly easy for me either, Willow," he stated.
"I'm sure it wasn't. But Oz, I spent weeks crying myself to sleep at night. Wondering where you were, if you were all alone, if you were all right. You knew where I was. And even though you chose not to, you knew how to reach me. You knew you could come back anytime, if you wanted to. I had no idea how you were. No phone calls, not even a short note. All I had was my fears, my nightmares, and my abysmal imagination."
"I'm sorry," he said softly. "I never meant to put you through all of that. I just needed time, after everything that happened."
"I'm not asking for your apology," she told him. "I'm not even sure you owe me one. I don't know what you expected to find when you came back here last night--"
"Certainly not--this," he answered, settling a dark gaze on the blonde vampire beside her.
"I didn't want to move on," she said. "In fact, I resisted it to the point that I nearly drove myself--and everyone else--crazy in the process. But you left me no choice. The world didn't stop spinning when you pulled out of Sunnydale. It went cock-eyed, for a very long time, but it kept right on moving. And, eventually--with an awful lot of help--so did I."
"What you're saying is that you don't want me, anymore," he concluded.
Willow sighed, "I don't know what I want. How can you expect me to? You suddenly drop back in from out of nowhere and expect everything to go on like nothing ever happened? That's incredibly unfair, Oz. Right now, the only thing I know for sure is that I don't ever want to go back to that place you left me in when you took off."
"I really am sorry, Will, for everything I put you through. Just tell me what you need from me--whatever it is--and you've got it."
"Time, I guess," she answered. "I'd just gotten used to the fact that you were gone, and now you're suddenly back again--"
"Then there's a chance that we could work this out?" he asked. "If there isn't, tell me now, and I'll head back the same way I came."
Spike tensed angrily at the quick flash of pain in the redhead's eyes. The pain was quickly replaced by outrage, and her hand found his and latched on, pulling him back as he took a step toward the wolf. "What the hell is that? Emotional blackmail?" she snapped angrily.
The vampire arched an eyebrow and grinned at the fire in the young woman's voice.
"No," Oz shook his head. "I just need--"
"You don't get to call the shots this time," she informed him. "I couldn't stop you the last time you ran off, and I can't stop you now. But if you leave again, don't come back. Ever. I waited months for you. I cried, and I ached, and I put myself and everyone I care about through hell. I won't do that again, not to myself and not to them. So stay, if you want, and allow me all the time I need to figure out what I'm feeling. Or run off if you want to play the coward--again. But know this. Either way, I'm through putting my life on hold for you. Got it?"
Buffy squeezed Riley's hand in a crushing grip. She looked past the angry redhead, exchanged a beaming smile of pride with the blonde vampire beside her, and resisted the urge to envelope Willow in a smothering hug of triumph.
Oz nodded and slumped back against the sofa, suddenly feeling very tired, "I'll stay. And I'll give you all the time you need. But I'd still like to talk to you alone, sometime."
"Not bloody likely," Spike said coldly. "Where she goes, I go."
Oz glared at him as the vampire wrapped an arm around Willow's waist. "Get used to it," Willow suggested in a tone that left no room for argument.
The End
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